Monday, March 31, 2008

Just Settle

In lieu of recent conversations with my fellow truth-seekers, close study of The Colbert Report (12 march 2008), and the Atlantic Monthly's article "Marry Him!", I have identified one of man's greatest enemies: Disney.

Now, I love "Bambi" and "Dumbo" just as much as the next person, but its not so much those genre-types that I publicly denounce. It's the Disney Princess mentality propagated by the other stories - the stories that girls and young women grow up having ingrained in their mind and wishing to believe, even forcing themselves to believe in some psychological aspect, that distort their sense of reality and serves not only to their detriment but ours as well.

So, it is my proposal here to make a couple clarifications for everyone, or no one, who reads this:
  • the knight in shining armor does not exist because you dreamed him up
  • you probably can't be even half as cultured as you expect him to be
  • soul-mates don't exist and neither do their synonyms
  • you're not a princess (even if your daddy told you so)
  • marriage doesn't solve problems and, therefore, there is no 'happily ever after'.
  • men who try to live up to the almost impossible expectations of 1) making you laugh constantly, 2) fitting your ideal, and 3) flamboyancy to catch your eye or stick out because that's the only way you'll recognize him will ultimately become depressed and you will tire of their constant antics and endeavors to please you.
  • Romance, the kind my mother wishes she has and only exists in her Harlequin romance novels, only exists in those novels....and Disney.
It's not all about you. It's not about landing a big fish. It's not about upgrading your status to 'queen' from 'princess'. It's about responsibility and benefiting society by raising children to contribute and continue to solve the problems that our generation will no be able to. It's about objectivity and realizing that he's going to settle for you, so you might as well settle for him. It's about objectivity. Maybe you'll have to just go for 'Mr. Good-Enough' instead of the non-existent 'Mr. Right'.

Honestly, a good man will have too much to do in life between holding down a good job and trying to be a good father to pamper you as a queen. I personally would much rather have someone to get down in the trenches with, so to speak, and is willing to tough-out life in a way that acknowledges and accepts reality.

In the long run you'll be happier and love will grow and deepen based on that kind of responsibility and realization. This is also not to say that there aren't people that one is more compatible with or that romance, in a realistic way, can't exist. I realize that perhaps the Disney Princess mentality isn't the rampant destroying psychological typhoon that I have made it out to be here, but the absurdity of it's existence begged this scathing criticism.

Refuse the fantasy. All it ever was...was chivalry in the wind.

No comments: